The actions, tones and phrases people use that tick us off, are usually because of past experiences. It could be they uncovered an insecurity we have or harped on something others have said over the years. Whatever triggers the flare-up, we automatically think they intentionally provoked us.
We choose to think that because, it’s easier to justify an outburst, if we were set up for it. But the truth is, most people don’t keep a notebook labeled “ways to make Bethany angry” They aren’t scheming to trip me up, and cause tension. (unless we’re talking about a little brother!)
But people blunder, they step on our proverbial toes, and unthinkingly annoy us. If we exercise self control, and avoid assigning wrong motives, we can allow ourselves to graciously move past the moment. This will save ourselves and others a lot of needless conflict.